I recently listened to a video about a man who had learned that gratitude is not something we can pick and choose the circumstances to apply it to. Rather the key is to be grateful for everything in our lives – both those that we perceive to be positive and those that we perceive to be negative. It is the combination of those opposing experiences that make us who we are, i.e. we would not be the same person if we had not had cancer or a heart attack or lost someone we love. As painful as those experiences may have been, they make us who we are and for that we must be grateful. We have the power within us to shape our responses to tragedies in our lives.
Henri Nouwen, a Dutch Roman Catholic priest, believes that gratitude must be inclusive. We must be grateful for all of our life, not just for favors bestowed. In his book, All Is Grace, he says,
“…how often we tend to divide our past into good things to remember with gratitude and painful things to accept or forget. Once we accept this division, however, we quickly develop a mentality in which we hope to collect more good memories than bad memories, more things to be grateful for than things to be resentful about…. But this way of thinking… prevents us from truly allowing our whole past to be the source from which we live our future. “
“Gratitude is not a simple emotion or an obvious attitude. It is a difficult discipline to constantly reclaim my whole past… It is hard precisely because it challenges me to face the painful moments… When our gratitude for the past is only partial, our hope for a new future can never be full.”
If you asked someone if they would rather succeed or fail, they would say they wanted to succeed. Who wouldn’t? But, success involves more than just wishing it was so.
What defines the road to success? –
Make decisions that will lead to the realization of your goal. Easier said than done, in most cases. Somewhere along the way, obstacles seem to find us and then the goal doesn’t look as straightforward as it once did.
Stay focused. Think of taking a picture. In order for you to see everything, you have to adjust your focus so the picture is clear. Achieving your goals is a matter of keeping the picture clear. That is where your mental focus comes into play. Your goal stays in focus when it is in the forefront of your mind. That’s essential when striving for your goal.
Total focus is the way to accomplish a goal but what that means for you depends on the goal. For example:
Let’s say that you want to lose weight. At some time in their lives, most people do. So you make a plan to accomplish this weight loss. Your plan might include exercise and eating better. Every time you eat, a conscious decision has to be made that reflects your goal. Do you eat a hamburger with everything or have a chicken breast with vegetables? When you plan your day, does it include exercise?
Focus is not obsessing. Obsession gets you on the scale five times a day. Focus, on the other hand, follows a plan. Your plan is to change your eating habits and increase you exercise to shed extra weight. Your plan can then be broken down into more specifics, as needed.
Focus moves forward always towards the goal you have set. When you are focused, there is always a new path to try when you hit a roadblock. Your eye is always on the goal. You may post pictures or affirmations around the house as continuous reminders.
Success with your goals is not a matter of luck but of looking towards the end result and staying focused on what you’re trying to achieve. Remember, it’s okay to stumble along the way, just don’t give up.
You are not alone in this world. You interact with several different people on a daily basis. It could be family, friends or coworkers but each person offers a unique relationship that can add to your life, if you let it.
It is not easy cultivating relationships. Think of a garden. In order for the plants and flowers to grow well they need love and attention. Turning over the soil, adding mineral nutrients and watering are all a part growing a healthy plan and relationships need that same type of nurturing.
There are several ways to keep the relationships in your life well tended. When they are, you’ll find a wealth of support and knowledge to help you achieve your personal goals.
Listen. Ask them about their day or how things are going with their families and really listen to what they say. Develop empathy for those you care about so you are able to understand where a they are coming from.
Communicate often. It is easy these days to lose touch. But, there is also a variety of ways to let someone know they are special in your life: cell phone, telephone, letter, texting and email besides face to face meetings. Let the special people in your life know you haven’t forgotten about them even though the years and miles keep you apart.
Spend time with others. We all need human contact. Create new memories with friends and family. Don’t neglect people for things. Relationships are always going to be the more valuable of the two.
Know yourself. It is hard to be a part of a group if you don’t know what you bring to it. Each of us has unique talents and skills. Sharing these traits in common with another begins a relationship. When you are secure in who you are and how you feel it is easier to share a part of yourself with others.
Define your commitment. Relationships take time and commitment. Are you willing to invest that time? When you put in the time, you notice things about others such as when they are not well or need your help. These non-verbal cues develop over time. If you want friends, you have to learn to be one first.
Relationships will wither away without proper care. It doesn’t take much to start a relationship but keeping it going requires commitment to share yourself with others to the benefit of both of you.
There is no one secret to success, but there are certain things most successful people do. As Aristotle said, “You are what you repeatedly do. Excellence is not an event – it is a habit.”
So fill your days with habits that will help you along the way.
Action.Take action each day by beginning the day with a clear plan. You can not do anything about yesterday or tomorrow so focus on today.
Gratitude. Spend time each day to appreciate the things you have. Start and end your day by listing 5 things for which you’re grateful. Soon, these feelings of gratitude will become a part of your life. When you fill yourself with positive feelings, more positive things begin to happen.
Visualization. Visualize the things you want. Experience the feeling of already having it. Your goal must become part of you and as it does, your subconscious will become more aware of opportunities that will present themselves.
Belief. Have faith in what you can do. Believe in yourself and if you don’t have belief in yourself, find someone who does. I’ve told my children many times when they would say, “I can’t do that” or I’m not good enough to do that”. I would ask them “do you believe that I believe you can?” They would say “yes” and my comment then is “Well then believe in my belief in you.” It’s amazing the results.
Recall all the previous successes you have had in your life. Use these memories to build self-confidence. When you believe that you can do something, you will find a way to make your belief come true.
Resources. Apply all available resources.This includes people you can discuss things with, or books, articles or multimedia that will help you develop the skills you need. Seek out the best sources of information that you can afford. Read something inspirational and innovative every single day. The best leaders have big libraries.
Remember, when you can create a burning desire by imagining your ultimate success, self-discipline will happen. If you do not have a burning desire, you may want to rethink your goals. Unless you feel passionate about your goals, the smallest obstacle will throw you off course.
The path to achieve your goal may be arduous but if the thought of it doesn’t bring you joy, reassess what you’re doing.
![[Ask]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/ask.png)
![[del.icio.us]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/delicious.png)
![[Digg]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/digg.png)
![[Facebook]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/facebook.png)
![[Google]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/google.png)
![[LinkedIn]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/linkedin.png)
![[Slashdot]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/slashdot.png)
![[Squidoo]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/squidoo.png)
![[StumbleUpon]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/stumbleupon.png)
![[Technorati]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/technorati.png)
![[Twitter]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/twitter.png)
![[Windows Live]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/windowslive.png)
![[Yahoo!]](http://wealthpossibilities.com/wp-content/plugins/bookmarkify/yahoo.png)
